These past few weeks I have spent pondering abundance, forgiveness, the ego, being happy when the world around me seems to be falling apart.....
What right have I to feel so much peace and bliss?
My heart breaks as I sense and see so much pain in others. It seems so easy to move into a space of joy, yet there are many who cannot seem to find this place where all is well and possibilities abound.
I ask myself if I have closed my heart, and yet I feel their pain, so no, I believe in my capacity to love, without judgement or conditions. Yet there is an impatience within me, where I just want everyone to be happy, to feel blessed, to understand the Miracle of Life.
If I could create this Miracle I would feel complete. It has been my quest since the age of 13 to bring joy into the world. Admittedly, I have often fallen over the cliff and found myself in depths of despair, greater than can be explained in this short blog. As I look back on those days when I was miserable, bringing many with me, I see it was all part of the plan to bring me back to where I am today - HAPPY FOR NO REASON or at least no logical reason.
Now, in meditation, I can see there is never a logical reason for living in joy. Joy does not come to us because we think it should, it comes because we know we are loved, protected, cared for, and blessed by something greater than logic. Miracles abound when we lose our sense of logic and open up to a world of nature, and natural progression.
Peace settles upon us when we no longer feel a need to compete or be better, faster, smarter, prettier - when we can come to a sense of who we truly are. As I wrote in "Don't Change For Heaven's Sake" when we start living from our Core Essence, we begin to acknowledge a Greater Force working in and through us, guiding us around obstacles and through the misty nights.
We must only be aware of the ego still fighting to be in control, telling us we are unworthy, in danger, alone, and dying. Quiet that little voice, keeping you up at night, worrying for your future. Your future is in good hands, if you will only open your heart to your Source of All Miracles.
Abundance surrounds you. Look at the sky, the trees, the grass, the birds. They are the abundance, and so are you. Feel it within you. You are filled with an abundance of ideas and inspiration if you will let go of the need to be logical. Your heart is overflowing with love, if you will let go of expectation and judgement. You have within you the Energy of Creation, where everything you could ever imagine is waiting for you to do just that. Bring it into your thoughts, move it into your heart, down into your solar plexus, then take the action required to bring it into the world.
Life is just waiting for you to choose between living in fear through the ego or living in joy through the expression of Source. It is the biggest choice you will ever make. At first it seems as though life is getting harder, as so much begins to fall away. You feel like you are losing. But stay with the course, keep your faith on a Greater Power at work, all that is taken is what is holding you back, keeping you stuck, stealing your joy. Let go, keeping your thoughts and emotions on the ideas you have for peace, love and joy. After the cleansing process you will begin to notice the sun shines a little brighter each day, there is a difference in the way you feel, you are less triggered by external events, and before long you will be waking up looking forward to what each day might bring.
And even though I wish this bliss for everyone, I am beginning to understand there are those who have found pain to be more valuable than joy, those who would not know how to live from a place of trust and faith. They are here to remind us, "there go I, but for the Grace of God". No one can be forced into happiness, it is a path we must choose, and to get there we must be prepare for seeming loss and even greater pain, until we understand there was never anything to fear, and nothing real can be taken from us or lost. Our choice must be to allow the Expression of Creator to move through us and in that moment everything but a love for life will remain. In that instant a blanket of protection drapes over us, and all there is, is joy.
At the core of your being, everything you desire is waiting .........