Victim or Victory?

 WHO IS MORE POWERFUL?

  THE PERSON PUSHING THE ROCK OR THE PERSON HOLDING BACK THE ROCK THAT IS ROLLING ONTO THEM?

 

 

 

 

Of course we think to ourselves the one pushing the rock down the hill will have more power behind them. They have the law of gravity on their side. We cannot see in this picture how big the person is who is pushing the rock, and really it is of little consequence. The young small person holding the rock back, you are thinking, will be crushed. What law of nature does he have on his side?

 

How often have you been in this situation? You feel like you are powerless and the rock and person pushing it are just to big and strong to stand against. You think of giving up and giving in. How many times have you been pushed this way, yet found your own inner power to push back and survive?

 

I was thinking this morning of personal power; it's use and abuse in our daily lives. This picture created the vision of what it is like to be in circumstances seemingly beyond our control because there are people who would abuse their power, pushing against us as though wanting to crush our spirit. Are they truly powerful people? Can they, even with the power of influence on their side, crush anyone who stands in their path? They seem to think so. Somehow in their perception they justify their reasons for pushing that rock. They feel a sense of power in winning a battle, that was of their own choosing. They create the circumstance and drama in which to beat down one who appears to be a threat to their power or status. If a rock is not available they will simply "pull the rug out" from beneath you, leaving confusion and disappointment in their wake, while they feel the surge of adrenalin that comes from winning a mighty battle. Are they really so powerful? Have they won any great prize?

 

I look at so many such circumstances, where one has to create a victim, in order to feel worthy in their own lives. How sad and pathetic it is.

 

If you had to choose, which would you be? The person pushing the rock, the rock, or the one who is pushing back to hold on to their own life? Many would rather be the one on the other side of the rock. It seems easier doesn't it? But is it? It certainly appears safer in the moment. The truth is we all have the choice, and many of us have been all three during the course of our lifetime. Sometimes we have not even been aware of the consequence of our choices, we have unknowingly bought into a drama or scenario, that causes us to take on one of the roles. But if you could be aware of all your actions, words, and decisions, which would you choose?

 

Though at times I get tired of pushing back against the boulders of life, it is my choice. When I look upon the would be victims of this world, I see the strength of mankind, a much more powerful law than the law of gravity. Strength to keep holding on each day is far greater than the strength it takes to roll a rock downhill. If you saw the young person in the picture as a victim you are wrong. Those who are kicked when they are down, are not a victim at all. Society only makes it so. Society justifies it as victimhood so they can feel the power of their own influence; so they can feel powerful. In actuality those who use their position in life to crush others are the victims, they are the ones we should pity. How sad their guilty triumphs must be when looking back on their life at the end of time.

 

For those who see themselves as the victim, as you stand holding back the rock, wanting to just let go and be crushed, I say, keep pushing. You are always stronger than the obstacles you face and you have the power of the Universe behind you. Feel your power as you see the threat against you. No one can take from you your most valuable asset, your self-worth, and you are much more worthy than the one pushing or the rock itself. Your integrity to keep going, is much more valuable to the world, than the influence of those who push. Continue to stand in your truth for you can be trusted. Hold fast to your belief in yourself for you will know authentic success. Forgive those who torment you, for they are the ones to be pitied. Stand with your head held high, knowing you there is no force in this life that can hold you back from your dreams and desires. Stand up for yourself against these would be bullies, not with brute force, but with compassion for the pain they must be feeling. You will find yourself at the top of the hill, looking down at the pile of boulders pushed your way, and know the true power of survival. And in the moment you can feel the triumph of being a true winner, a champion of life.

 

 



Forgive and Find Joy

Why do we assume there is something wrong? We need to blame either ourselves or someone else for situations and events. We take a defensive stance when confronted with another's misunderstanding of what is happening. Often we shift the blame to the one who is confused, angry or upset. Why?

Somewhere we have been taught anything that does not make others happy is our fault. We are not good enough. We are somehow broken. Our ideas cannot be good enough or everyone would just simply agree. When our judgement is questioned it triggers the response of defending our worthiness. We find ourselves lashing out or withdrawing into silence. We seldom open to discussion on these alternate opinions or ideas, afraid we may see a different point of view, thus making our point wrong. But is there a wrong or right opinion to anything that happens in life? Is life not just a perception?

One of the biggest reasons I have found for this push and pull between us, is the need to feel we are in control. Our subconscious has been programed to believe others are either better than us or beneath us. Therefore we need to defend our position on the ladder of life. But is there anyone who is better or beneath anyone? Is there a need to defend our position, if we are all equal? Is it not acceptable to understand another's point of view without feeling there is something wrong with us?

As is my usual Easter custom, I sit in meditation and consider forgiveness. Forgiveness of self and others. More and more I find myself asking, "What is there to forgive?" This ritual shows me how I am taking life too personally. We are here to experience. Those who push our "Hot Buttons" or illicit hurt or anger, can be appreciated rather than defamed for they are showing me where I still have the belief, "I am not good, worthy,  smart or important enough. Those beliefs have nothing to do with anyone else but me. I need in times of feeling a need to forgive someone else, to realize I created this experience to teach me more about who I think I am.

So then, what is left to forgive? I have long since forgiven the bullies, abusers, and naysayers in my life. I have even found a place of gratitude for the strength they have given me. Do I need to forgive those who disagree with my perception of life and what should be? No, they are entitled to their opinion. I can be grateful for the different aspect they have on a particular idea, for it broadens my mind.

Forgiveness of self is all that is left. Forgiveness for those times when I have responded without opening my mind and heart to what another feels in a situation. Forgiveness for self for those times I have made an assumption without hearing the whole story. Forgiveness of self for thinking I am not worthy of all that is good in life. Forgiveness for desiring control when control is not appropriate or necessary. Forgiveness for some and any belief that allows another to push those old buttons of the past, when the past is gone. Forgiveness for thinking I should be able to control the future when there is a greater power within me who will guide me if I just drop the pretense that my ego is all there is to guide me. Forgiveness of self for looking either up the ladder or down, when in truth I know we are all equal, all one, with a unique set of qualities and ideas that make the experience of life, rich and textured.

As I conclude my meditation for this year it comes to me that most misunderstandings are based on assumption, creating a story without allowing ourselves to hear the truth from others. We are so afraid of the truth that we shut out those who we presume have wronged us and create a story that gives basis to our right to be angry, hurt, and disgruntled. If we could instead create a story that says I am enough, they are enough and together we create a beautiful world, the need for this Easter custom could end.

Is it not enough that one man died on the cross, must we carry that hurt, burden and sacrifice as well? To do so negates that which we were taught in Sunday School, that Jesus died on the cross to forgive the sins of man eternally. Can we not remember this and forgive without pain and suffering?

For in forgiveness we find the joy we are seeking.

Remembering Who You Are & Why You Are Here

I have been sitting with the workbook, considering how I can present the material each week, so participants can really feel the blessing of life. As I ponder the material I realize there are three things I would hope to have everyone walk away from the 8 week program knowing in their hearts:
                               

YOU DON'T NEED TO CHANGE - YOU ARE ALREADY PERFECT

STOP TRYING TO FORGIVE YOURSELF - YOU NEVER DID ANYTHING WRONG

THERE IS NO NEED TO FIX WHAT IS NOT BROKEN - SIMPLY REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE

We put too much stress on ourselves, trying to be what society has decided we need to be. We put too much stress on the need to control ourselves, our lives, our circumstances. We live in fear that if we don't meet the expectations of our loved ones, we will lose them, if we do not perform exactly according to the standard of our bosses, we will be unemployed, if we don't give our children everything they want, they will hate us...... Before we know it we have forgotten who we really are.

Then we go for help in sorting out the mess and we are told - well change this or that and everything will work out. In a short time we notice that yes, things have changed, but we still haven't lost the fear or need to be accepted and appreciated by others. We are still unhappy.

We turn again for help and we are told - forgive yourself - and at once we take on the acceptance that we are the cause of all the problems. We beat ourselves up for all the mistakes and errors of our past and remember our parents telling us all the things that made us fearful of rejection in the past. We may not remember them all, but our subconscious does, and our ego just loves to remind us. And in the admission of asking ourselves for forgiveness we enforce within ourselves the idea or belief that we are bad people - you can add your own label here.

Instead of forgiving yourself, why not just start loving yourself? Why not say to yourself, I made a mistake, I could have chosen something different. I accept what I did, understanding that there was a lesson to be learned for all parties involved. In the same way you let go of the little hurts your children cause you, continuing to love them unconditionally, can you not do the same for yourself? Can you not give yourself a hug, agree to remember the lesson, and carry on knowing you can make a different choice next time a similar situation arises?

We were created to be an expression of Spirit. There were certain lessons, and ideals we agreed to work on for the expression of our Creator. Like being an actor, taking a part, we chose a role, to assist our soul in growing and loving unconditionally. In order to learn the lesson, accept the belief there are certain scenarios that must take place, in one form or another. So, even as you act in ways that are less than perfect, you are merely playing the role in a movie you contracted to play. The best way to have a happy ending is to accept, release and love your way through the bad times.

I often feel I am a character in a video game, moving from level to level, dodging the obstacles, moving debris out of the way, sidestepping the bad guy and racing for a finish line. It is exhausting, creates sleepless nights, and causes all kinds of aches and pains in my physical body. Ever feel that way?

I end the game when I take time to breathe, to realize, I can let go of the need to struggle and fight my way through life. I can breathe, relax and allow Spirit to guide me. As I do I feel the flow, and transcend each level in peace, joy and love. Ahhhhh ..... how much better I feel.

You are not broken. You have been programmed with a lot of harmful, self-destructive beliefs. You are programmed to believe you are not good enough, and you must continually change and fix yourself until you meet a certain standard - and the bar keeps raising, leaving you feeling even less than the perfection you truly are. As we learn what these beliefs are and reprogram our self conscious, our world begins to shift and change - it is not us who are changing, only the world around us. We become more as we were created - pure, divine love. Our body stops revolting against the stress we have caused it. Our minds become more clear, and the thoughts more peaceful. Those things we desire for our lives begin to magically appear.

Once again we remember the perfection we knew at the time of our conception, and even at our birth. Wouldn't it be nice to understand how to take responsibility for your life, to create the peace, joy health and prosperity you dream of, without the need to rigidly control all the circumstances, knowing there is an energy doing the work for you, if you are willing to let go and get out of the way?

There is, and when I give myself permission, to just be me, I find pure health, bliss, and abundance are all around me and within me.

Are you willing and ready to let go and receive?

Miracles and the Soul

Sit quietly for just a moment. Focus on your heart center. Fill it with all the love you can possibly feel. Continue to fill that space with all of the expressions of love – forgiveness, gratitude, compassion, joy, peace, prosperity, vibrant health. You have just experienced a miracle!

According to A Course In Miracles, “miracles occur naturally as expressions of love”. Miracles are happening all the time, everywhere to everyone, but our perception of daily life blocks the idea of a miracle occurring. It is only when someone is rescued from death, instantly healed, or receives unexpected abundance that we declare a miracle. In awe, we speak of the event, as though it is an unnatural or abnormal occurrence. In those times when we forget our humanness and allow the Spirit of God to take control, miracles happen. In truth, miracles are not meant to bring awe, but to inspire gratitude and healing to areas of your life where you feel lack and fear.

All of us have the ability to provide miracles, through our forgiveness of others and ourselves. When we fill a need in the life of another, pour love out to the world without condition, or finally accept our own holiness, we have been a co-creator in a miracle.

We are all expressions of the miracle of life. Those who have children, feel the miracle at the birth of their children. At birth, we are still able to feel and know the soul of this new physical body. Life has not erased their memory. The love and trust that emanates from this little being, allows our soul to connect to theirs and unconditional love forms an eternal bond.

Each of us, created as miracle, cannot lose that essence, even with age. As we grow older and begin to see, feel and hear the beliefs and paradigms of our care-givers, we lose touch with the inner guidance and knowing. We are told what is right and wrong. We are told what to do "for our own good". We are disciplined for certain behaviors, and congratulated for others. Most of these decisions are based on the beliefs of our parents and grandparents.

When we see our angels and guides and tell the adults in our life, they are called imaginary friends. We lose faith in what we see and faith in ourselves for believing that these loving beings exist. It is here we begin to lose our faith in love, in our creator, in ourselves. The miracles are gone.

Yet where do we get the strength to rescue someone from a burning building, pull a child out of the way of a moving vehicle, carry someone for miles to safety? What is this voice that comes in the instant of danger and seemingly changes a traffic pattern, so we avoid an accident? How do we know not to take a specific route, a particular flight? How do we know that today is not a good day to go work and later find their has been a threat to life during the time we would have been on the subway, at the bank or in our office building? How do healing miracles occur?

We need only look to our soul, and believe once again in "imaginary friends" to find the answer.

Sit quietly for just a moment. Focus on your heart center. Fill it with all the love you can possibly feel. This itself is a miracle and a way to return to the innocence and trust of a child. With that unconditional love miracles are an everyday, normal occurence. Life becomes a new adventure, filled with endless possibility?

What miracle will you be today?